They looked so very happy.  He was holding her from behind, swaying to the music coming from the band playing on the outdoor stage ahead of them.  She would turn to him and they would kiss a bit, hug one another and then dance together some more.  They were probably in their early to mid twenties and it was a pleasure to watch them. 

I wanted to go talk to them, find out their story, and ask how they met and how long they had been a couple.  I didn’t.  I was with some dear friends and didn’t want to leave the wonderful spot that I was in listening to the same great band while I was soaking up the sun and the love from the friendship circle that I was with.

Why is it that some people so easily find a great partner while others seem to be in a holding pattern, circling around and around, never really finding a place to land…or someone to land on?  Grin.    Is it really as some say, that only thin and beautiful women get to have the dating/loving fun?  I hear so many women saying that they need to lose weight.  And when I ask them what losing weight would do for them, their answers are pretty standard.

“I could have a boyfriend if I were thinner.”

“I would have better self-esteem.”

“Fat people can’t get a good job.”

“I could have better clothes, nothing for fat people looks good.”

The list is long and distinguished and I am always willing to listen.  And then lovingly, am always willing to give the advice that I am CERTAIN they want from me.  Ok, so maybe not everyone is looking for my advice, but I generally offer it anyhow.

I like to say that you can hang anything on “THE FAT TREE”, but it is pretty crazy.  You know it, right?  The fat tree:  If I were thinner I would have better clothes, a better job, better sex, better friends, better anything.  So they hang everything on the “Fat Tree.”  And the tree shakes and shudders under the weight of all of the crap hung on it. Continue Reading