Curvy Confidential

I just came back from a nice vacation with family in Texas and have re-entered the dating scene running – and with fresh enthusiasm and confidence.   There is something about being in Texas – with strong, healthy, BIG, down-to-earth people that really fortifies me and erases any bit of negative self-image that may have crept in due to the challenge of being a size 16 single woman living in Los Angeles.

I had a first date this week  with this guy named Derek…who I met through a dating site for curvy girls.   Going on dates from the curvy site is usually less stressful for me since I know these men are going to LOVE my curves.  On other dating sites – for the general public – you run into the chance of meeting guys who don’t really like curvy girls, but will make exceptions… I don’t want to be anyone’s exception!

Anyhow, Derek is a few years younger than me.  I haven’t dated a younger man in lord knows how long and now I remember why.   Derek was very sweet, very cute, but not very in to me, even though he kissed me on the lips during dinner on our date (I HATE the first kiss being rushed).   He only texted me the next day – how rude – Life is just too short to spend time with a guy who is not head over heels for you.    I think texting is so impersonal.   At least, I got to dress up and go to a nice restaurant, so that was pleasant, but unfortunately just not a love connection.

What do you think about dating younger men (Derek excluded) and the whole cougar phenomenon?  Can true love ever bloom when there’s an age difference?  Younger women dating older men is an accepted norm in our society.  Is the reverse now true?

Okay. I was having a girls’ night the other night and before the movie we started talking about women’s studies and somehow got onto the topic of women’s image. We went all over the place; talking about suffrage, women’s rights, the lack of chivalry and politeness in general (sorry guys, but chivalry just isn’t as common as it used to be!) and of course, women’s self esteem and self-image in the world today.

There once was a time any man would hurry to open a door or pull out a chair. You would pass by and hats would tip to you left and right. In the society we live in now, that has become a rarity. These days it’s more common than not, to have an elevator door close on you as you rush to make it in, and hats are left on as if stuck with superglue.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying all men behave like this. It’s just the number of those who have lost their manners has increased dramatically over the last few generations. There are still some men (and if you find one, keep him!) that will open the door for you, and not only you. To be a true gentleman they will hold it for you and the group walking in behind you. They will hurry to open your car door, and let you pass ahead of them as you walk through a tight squeeze on the sidewalk.

Some would argue that this decline in society contributes to the lack of self esteem and self respect that we see in the women of today. I even heard a close friend of mine say “Men make me feel the worst about myself. Sometimes I feel as if I don’t even deserve to have a door held open for me anymore.” We know it isn’t anything personal men, but women are complicated and observant beings and the little things mean a lot. I’m sure it also stems from the difference in how boys and girls are raised. Girls are brought up awaiting their fairytale prince and being told to stay clear of the wrong kind of guy. However boys these days are being taught less and less about manners and chivalry, replacing Cotillion with PS3’s and YouTube. Continue Reading »

I love working at Hips and Curves.  Today was Marabou Pump day and like some of our other crazy theme days (Make-up Monday, Fashion Friday) everyone gets involved.  When I was sitting in a staff meeting this morning I had to laugh out loud looking around at everyone’s fluffy feather shoes.   The CEO, buyers, planners, customer service people – everyone was wearing high heeled marabou pumps!  It’s funny how wearing a hot pair of heels can make a normal Tuesday fun  

I snapped some pictures around the office and had to share…

I’ve always been interested in what makes men attracted to certain women so I decided to ask three of my friends to tell me why they love dating curvy girls like us…. Here are their answers…

From Manuel – a civil engineer and one of my dear friends from Italy:

Ciao Misty! Here are some thoughts to your question… thanks for asking.

I think what I like most and I would extend many men like about bigger women is the absolute appearance of the female form.  Many women, while trying to stay thin or exercise too much are coming to a point where they look more like men dressed up like women.

When you combine the softer appearance of a real woman with a proportioned body, the image conveys the idea of a woman who fully appreciates all that life has to offer, who seeks every joy in life and that shows to the world her appreciation of Joy.  Furthermore, it enhances and boosts all the sexual symbols that are embedded in our brains, and the desire of experiencing all that fulfillment is pervading!

hmmm… I can’t wait for my Italian vacation later this year to get some of that appreciation in person!

From Adam – an extremely fun and dynamic CEO from Los Angeles:

Okay, let me start off by saying that I love women. I love their femininity, their sweetness and their softness.  This goes hand-in-glove with what you’re asking.  Crudely, I’m drawn to hips and butts and boobs.  More subtlety, however, I love women’s curves.  It’s the curves in a woman’s silhouette that melt me every time.   I like feeling wrapped in love, enveloped, if you will, and a “skinny” girl just can’t hold me the way a woman of substance can.

As for the “look” of a curvy girl, there’s just something about natural cleavage and the soft yielding flesh of a healthy figure that makes me swoon every time.

Ah yes, there is nothing I love more than making a man swoon!

And finally my favorite sentiment 

From Matt – a blue collar guy from the Midwest with a heart of gold:

You know, there is a place between the shoulder and hip that is meant for an arm.   I mean… have you ever driven through Nebraska?   It’s flat and boring and I think that is why not too many people live there.   I like scenery and points of reference, terrain that lets you know where your at. 

Well said, darlin’… I’m happy to be your road map anytime!

We want to hear from other men – what makes you attracted to curvy women?

I am pretty sure she didn’t even know why she was saying those things.  I am pretty sure that she learned this type of dialogue from friends or family or society in general.  I wasn’t angry, just amazed. This has happened many times in my life and continues to this day. 

Let me tell the story.  You decide.

I have been in theater, mainly musical theater, for many years.  I began in the 7th grade at Newhall Junior High School in Wyoming, Michigan, continued throughout my school years and then Community Theater.  I have sung, acted, directed and music directed as well.  

I was in a production in Lansing, Michigan.  I loved this theater and the group of friends that I had become acquainted with.  I have a dear friend that directed me in a show and we have been friends for well over 20 years now.  

I had a great role in a production and worked with several amazingly talented actors.  We had gone all through the rehearsals and we were actually now in the performance piece.  I was on stage for most of the show and had several costume changes in the dressing room.  Each night I found myself with just one other actress in the room, by ourselves, making costume changes.  

I will call this actress Nina.  

Nina was a petite brunette.  She was a brilliant actress and singer.  She was very well known in the area and received many accolades, both in person and in the media.  (I set this stage so you KNOW that she was complimented and raved about on a regular basis.)  

It began the first night of the performance.  When she and I were alone in the dressing room and changing our costumes, she looked in the mirror while in her pantyhose and bra and said, “Hmmmmm, I think that I am looking a little fat.” Continue Reading »